I have been married for almost 14 years, and have done quite a few things during those years. This is what I have learned.
The first seven years I lived in Houston, Dallas, New York City and San Francisco. I dropped out of college to be with my husband who had already graduated. During those seven years I went to Hawaii every year and attempted to play golf on some of the best Golf Courses around the United States. I owned my first house in those 7 years.
I started battling with pesky pre-cancer dysplasia on my cervix and in the end had part of my cervix removed. I had my retina’s detach and surgically re-attached. I had mono for the second time and was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.
I had artificial insemination 12 times and Invitro fertilization once in those seven years and there were no children.
During the next 5 years, I had my daughter and my son. I owned my second home and started building my third home. I stayed in Houston, but moved several times, ending in a leased house that was very small while the building was taking place. I was religious during those five years. Going to temple every single Saturday and observing Shabbat. Keeping a kosher home. Celebrating all major and minor Jewish Holidays.
I was a tennis mom during the day, and spent most of my time lunching and tennissing with my friends. I had full time help and my duties as a wife and mother were minimal. I started a very successful high end consignment store during those five years. I did pilates twice a week every week and cooked dinner almost every night. I had a Mastiff named Cocoa Puff. I spent every vacation in the Caribbean.
For the past 8 months, I have been living in my fourth house. I own a lot that will never be built on. I have a nice life. I spend lots of time with my kids, only having someone cleaning 1.5 days a week. I have two Great Danes. I don’t travel much and am involved in my kid’s school. I rarely get a babysitter. I have had a complete hysterectomy and been put into surgical menopause. I have once again reinvented myself.
My husband spends most of his time in another city with his other family, which I am not a part of. My kids and I have a routine that works for us. We are happy most of the time. I am pursuing my dream and more importantly allowed to pursue that dream.
I have been married a total of almost 14 years….to three different men.